Benefit Review

Feel free to skip this if Sephora means nothing to you. It's mostly for my Mum who always asks me what make up I wear cause one of her colleagues asks for recommendations. I don't like hearing that since said colleague is about 40, and I still harbour the vain hope that some day my skin will be perfect. The only thing that truly aids my skin is water. I have to drink a LOT to get good results, but it's worth peeing every 45 minutes to have a better complexion.

In the meantime I am devoted to Benefit. It's not the best at everything (Nars has better blusher, Urban Decay's eye shadow primer is number 1, and I wouldn't trade my Max Factor mascara for anything...except maybe Dior's) but here is a run down of what's in my collection, so you can reference it if you're ever having once of those days when you feel the need to Tippex out your face and start again:

Boing - Concealer
They don't call this industrial strength concealer for nothing.
This makes my face resemble it's former self; before year of staying up too late to finish work I should have done earlier/ hours of crying over no good boys and girls/ doing tireless research on how well the public transport system works in various cities in the middle of the night, after consuming as many Lemon Drops as my wallet would allow (That's not many, Mum. They're expensive!). Please note the packaging has downgraded to look particularly crappy these days - some nonsense about how the inclusion of a mirror causes condensation on the concealer. Having no mirror is much worse, but it's worth the hassle anyway.

Erase Paste - Concealer
This is so awesome I have it in 2 shades. Number 1 for when I am pale in winter and need the extra brightness, number 2 for when I am generally tanned.
Hilariously, it actually comes with a little plastic trowel enabling you to properly spackle your face. Don't use the trowel, just a light finger tip. It's a lighter texture, a looser creamier feel than Boing. It's better for under eyes but less durable on other facial areas.

Eye Bright - Um, I don't know what this is supposed to come under - trickery?
I have this in pencil form, excellent for one's handbag, and in a genius contraption that LNB gave me for Christmas. It is half Boing and half Eye Bright in a cute compact complete with mirror (the original Boing packaging no less!). It makes you look awake when you're not. I'm not sure how convincing it is, but I really like it. It works for me, but is more of an added extra than a necessity.

Some Kinda Gorgeous - Foundation, kinda
I want to like you, Gorgeous 'foundation faker', I really do. You have such cute packaging, with your old school record shape design and very chic compact mirror. But I only think you're ok. This is because in a matter of weeks I have slapped so much of this light base onto my face that I can already see the plastic at the bottom of the compact. If you actually have perfect skin and are just pretending to need make up, for the glamourous application factor or the packaging or whatever, then this is for you. I actually need help so this does not give enough of a foundation for me. I long for Hello Flawless which is about twice the price but since I have used it many times in the shop I know it covers more and stays on longer. Plus I really want to own something in a shade called 'Me Vain? Champagne'. It's adorable.

It Stick - Concealer
Another concealer? Really? YES. This is perfect for under my nose where is gets red. Hey, I like wine and I'm Irish, it's only going to get worse with time so I have to combat it now. This works inexplicably, it's a pencil you actually draw on your face with. Follow your artwork with the lightest of pats to smooth it in and you are ready to go out in public without looking like a wino.

Bad Gal Eyeliner - like it says
How different can one stick of charcoal be from another, you might ask? The answer is very. I would never have found this out, preferring to pay 2 squid for a Revlon version back home, if it wasn't for a free Bad Gal I got with a copy of Glamour magazine. This stuff is smoky and gorgeous and glides on. Wear it with the Urban Decay primer for punk rock eyes that would stay on for days if you were actually going to rock out. Or 'oot'.

That Gal - Primer
That Gal aint for this gal, that's for sure. It feels nice putting it on, it's pink and is meant to give you a glowy pink freshness. I honestly can't tell whether I have it on or not. If you want a primer you can feel the difference with try Smashbox or Laura Mercier. Yeah, I know, and a Porsche while you're at it. It's hard to pay so much for an invisible film that goes on your face before any actual make up, but just because That Gal comes in a pretty shade does not make it work for me. Absolutely gorgeous tube though.

Hoola - Bronzer
Hahaha! You will laugh at yourself in the mirror when you first put this on. It needs a really light touch if you're to refrain from looking like a guest on Jerry Springer (that is to say - seriously muddy fake tan). I actually love this though; be light, swirl it in well and top with a little bit of blusher for summer perfection. Look! You're luminous!

Dandelion - Blusher
I haven't owned one of these in a long time but it's a long standing favourite ( it got edged out by Nars's fabulous yet dumbly named Orgasm Blush). It is sheer and pink and gives a lovable rosy glow. Like you've been kissing and eating fruit; sexy yet wholesome all at the same time.

Dr. Feelgood - Primer/skin 'protector'
This does feel good. It's like a seriously smooth talking date. By the end of your first encounter the medicinal old fashioned scent and silky feeling you get will have you convinced it's a keeper. But once you realise the lid of the tin gets permanently stuck on and can't be worked off without some kind of heavy duty utensil, you will lose patience and your love will quickly fade. Fond memories remain though, and I'd give this retro little accessory another whirl anytime. If I also had a screwdriver handy.

Benetint - Blusher/lip stain
I LOVE this. How can you not. It's made of roses, it smells of roses, and leaves you looking like you have delicious, devilish thoughts running through your mind constantly and that you are a lot more fun than you actually are. (Maybe I was applying too much?!) Too bad the lid broke before I was even a quarter of the way through using it. If this leaks in transit you are going to have one rose tinted mess on you hands. Not worth the worry. I like the lip balm version more.

Stay Don't Stray- Eyeshadow and Concealer Primer
Cute name! I like this. I think. It's hard for me to give it a chance as I am already in love with the Urban Decay version. See if you can get a free sample of both and try them out. What? You don't have that kind of time on your hands? Well don't worry, you probably have a real job to go to. You could probably afford to take the bus to visit a friend without having to arrange a salary advance.


Hey, at least I'll be the most well-concealed woman on the bus. And yes, I understand that probably the reason I am so broke right now is because I spent my 20s purchasing all the above products. It was worth it. It's not akin to spending $40,000 on shoes, like Carrie Bradshaw.